Just One Brownie

Brownies.

It all started because of brownies.  My sweet, precious, dimple-faced 4-year old had been given a very yummy dinner of chicken noodle soup and homemade rolls.  And then was offered a brownie.  She, of course, took the brownie willingly, and ate it very quietly at the table.  As the adults sat around the table, I noticed her start reaching for another.  I gently told her “No”.  About 30 seconds later, I looked over, and she was not only reaching for another brownie, but she was sitting on TOP of the table, trying her hardest to get closer.  This continued for about 5 minutes until we decided to remove the temptation from her sight.  And we thought all was well.  Until it was almost time to leave our friend’s house. 

Chloe Beth came back into the dining room, carrying a brownie!  She had somehow managed to get one, and, with a grin on her face, she sat down at the table to eat it, as if we were going to let her.  We promptly took the brownie from her, and the meltdown happened.  For…a long, long time.  There was pouting.  There were tears.  There was the repeated cry of “Brownie!  Brownie!  Brownie!”  We literally carried her out of the house and loaded her in the car, and drove half of the way home before the crying stopped. 

And as I sat there, in amazement, thinking back over the evening, wondering what would make her break down in such a way over one little brownie, it struck me.  I do that kind of thing all the time!  I may not cry and throw a tantrum in classic 4-year old style, but I certainly can pout. 

Here’s what I’m talking about:  God has given me so, so very much.  And yet, I take what he has given me, I look at it, and I say, “I want MORE!  This is just not enough.”  It seems like the more I get, the more I want.  And I can’t help but wonder if it’s because I’m just not thankful enough for what I actually have.

I am convinced that one of the biggest challenges for me, and for most American Christians is contentment.  We want to have Christ, but we also want to have more of everything else.  We’re not satisfied with what He has given us.  We’re just not happy with that one brownie.  We’ve got to have another one…no matter what the cost. 

God has blessed me so much.  My husband is my very best friend, and acts as if he is the most privileged man in the world to be married to me, even though I know that’s so far from the truth.  My children bring me joy, make me laugh, and teach me new things every single day.  I have a church family that I can truly say is family, and has been since we pulled into the parking lot a little over 2 years ago.  I have parents that I cherish, and that truly talk the talk and walk the walk.  I have a warm home.  I have food in my cupboards.  I have a dependable car to drive.  I have a fun job.  I have opportunities to sing with kids at church every week.  I get to support my husband as he serves.   I could go on. And on.  And on.

But yet, I complain.  I want more.  I want a bigger house.  I want a newer car.  I want different food.  I want more shoes.  I want more money at the end of the month.  I want…more.    

WHY?  Why in the world do I think that one more brownie will make me happy?  Why do I pass by all of the good stuff that I’ve already got:  the chicken noodle soup, the homemade rolls, AND the first brownie….all because I want more?

You see, what Chloe Beth didn’t realize was that one more brownie may have made her sick.  She may have been throwing up all night long.  Or it may have made her wide awake, which would make her miss out on something really good…called SLEEP.  Or, it may have tasted really good, but it just would have filled her stomach so that there wasn’t room for something else that could have been BETTER for her. 

Thanksgiving really is all about contentment.  How in the world can we look at ALL that God has given to us and done for us, and say, “Thanks, God, but it’s really not enough.  I think I would like you to do more.”  Paul learned that lesson, when he wrote in Philippians,:

“I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.” 

 

I pray that I would learn that lesson, as Paul did. 

Contentment is about accepting the “meal” that God has laid out on the table for us.  It’s about trusting that He knows what is best for us, and that His food will make us strong, healthy, and more like His Son.  It’s about knowing that He is the Master Chef of our Thanksgiving dinner, and we are to be content with what He has served. 

I pray that this Thanksgiving we will all be surrounded by the things that make us happy.  I hope we get to eat our favorite foods, are surrounded by loved ones, and have an amazing time making memories.  And I hope that we all will be satisfied.  And thankful.

With just one brownie. 

 

 

 

 

 

Silence is Not So Golden

Silence.  It's one of those things that can be the most wonderful thing in the world.  Or it can be the most not-wonderful thing in the world.  As a mom, silence can mean your kids are peacefully sleeping, or it can mean they are getting into something.  Or everything.  Following moments of silence, I have found permanent marker on carpet, baby powder dumped on bathroom floors, hair "washed" in milk, a little girl with marker "makeup", and even a little boy with painted toenails.  So often, we love the silence.  We long for the silence.  We dream about the silence. But, after the silence, we often find nothing but a mess. 

I was thinking the other day about how silence factors into our relationship with God.  I'm not talking about the times in life that God is silent.  I'm talking about the times that God finds us "silent".  I probably need to be clear:  There is rarely a day that I could ever be called silent.  I love to talk.  But, admittedly, there have been times that I have been silent with God.  There have been days that I have had a lot to say.  A lot of nothing.  A lot of something.  And I am really good at finding friends that will listen. I call when something wonderful happens.  I call when something terrible happens.  I call when I just need to vent some frustrations.  And I call when I just want to share a funny story.  And I love that my friends answer.  I love that I have dear friends in Christ that want to share my life with me.  But, unfortunately, there are days that God would probably say that I've been "silent".  And when I'm silent with God, there's sure to be a mess to clean up.

You see, when I don't turn to God first thing in the morning, I can make a real mess.  Sometimes those messes are easy to clean up, like the baby powder.  Other times, those messes can leave a permanent stain, just like the Sharpie on the carpet. 

I have been the one guilty of waking up, and going straight to the computer to see what might have happened in my friends' lives while I am sleeping. I have been the one guilty of checking the weather, the news, the email, all before I read the Bible.  I have been the one that scurries my kids and husband out the door to school, and then instead of taking a few moments to say "Good Morning" to God, I call my friend.  And the thought of that brings me to tears. 

I have...and you have...this amazing opportunity.  Every single day.  We get to approach the throne of the Most High God.  We get to share our burdens with Him.  And our joys.  And our love. And our lives.  But yet, so many times, I don't.  When something challenging comes up, I run to search Google.  I post on Facebook.  I call my friends.  Too often, God is the last one I turn to.  Maybe it's because I want an immediate answer.  Maybe it's because I don't think I'll like what He has to say.  Or maybe it's just because I am sinful girl who doesn't have my priorities in order. 

Two of my very favorite Bible verses are Hebrews 4:15-16.  "For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."  Does that thrill you the way it does me?  If not, you may want to re-read it.  I'm amazed every time.  We can approach God's throne....with confidence! Why in the world do we substitute everything else for His throne?  We get news of a sick loved one.  Approach the throne.  We get an unexpected financial blessing.  Approach the throne.  We need to plan our day.  Approach the throne.  Our kids won't stop fighting. Approach the throne.

I am really good at making messes.  When I cook, my kitchen looks like a war zone.  Why do I think that my life will look any different if I don't bathe everything...and I mean everything...in prayer?  Why do I think that if I don't search my heart to make sure that God is in the very center of every one of my desires that anything will work out right?  It's just plain foolish of me.  God wants us to approach Him. Daily.  He doesn't want us to be silent.  He wants to hear our voices cry out to Him.  He wants to hear our voices rejoice in Him.  And we can do all of that boldly.  With confidence.  Without hesitation. 

And that, my dear friends, is amazing.